March 9 2007

" The reality of the people in your life and what they are for fact in your eyes never ment the same thing. In childhood you don't see the lie or the second layer of skin attached to the one in front of you, that might be the closest of your friends - reason why it is considered the time of innocence- or naivety. You grow faster or slower (but forced though this fragile part of your life either way)and you drive yourself unwillingly to see an unknown face of the same people you knew maybe most of your life- a face that thou you didn't wish to be brought to surface- is the extent of what reality is really all about.
The diversity of appearance, when you get to the actual truth, hits harder and more painful than any punch in the face.
The bruises aren't visible to the surface, but they hurt as hell.
Stop expecting a positive reaction from my side, you won't find it there anymore. The forgiving mask stays, but I'll bite from behind it, and the bite marks remain. I'll take you slowly, but it will be eternal.
I have hidden my grief enough, and once you feel the sweet taste of revenge it is more than stupidity to go back to what people expect you to do. I stop sitting on the side-line. Predictability isn't on my side...so I won't use it in your favor. Sorry, but you'll regret trying something with me. I got fed up with it, and you're too many- if not all- that want the pink view from my personality, you won't obtain anything but appearances. No". From now on you will find that as very often used in my dictionary. And I will seem sweeter than honey- reason why the abruptness will be more sudden. Beautiful- that's all I can say. The deceitfulness of life is defined by beauty. Nothing is beautiful unless we make it that way.
Life isn't ugly, but it's bitter with disgust.
Everything passes with time. Yes, people pass, time passes, life goes with it. The bitchiness with which it takes you from the back, even the closest friend, stays on every road walked throughout life.
Time to face it. I left it pass for too long, closed my eyes and say it was nothing, closed my mouth and smiled and made you think there is no reason to get upset. Do you feel it now? I'm not leaving. I'm going straight ahead."